Five years old….playing softball for the first time, making my first “best” friend – and it’s you.
1st grade….fighting with another classmate over whose boyfriend Brant is, the teacher catches us hitting each other, and one person insists to the teacher that I didn’t start it…that person is you.
4th grade…I’m out sick and a classmate doesn’t want you to bring my makeup work home to me because she wants me to get behind. I get a phone call from someone crying and saying she should have never agreed to go along with that because she’s my friend and isn’t going to keep it from me…the person on the phone is you.
7th grade…I play a little aggressively in handball and make a much bigger, much stronger 8th grader mad at me. She wants to fight me after school. Not one to fight but also not one to be bullied, I tell her I’ll meet her. One person comes to my locker after school to accompany me to the “fight”…again, you (luckily, the fight didn’t happen).
11th grade…friends get upset over my group getting a higher grade on a project than they got. I respond by crying. One person whips around in her desk and jumps to my defense…it’s you.
In college…my brother, Dan, calls and ask me for my friend’s number. It’s yours.
A couple years later….my brother, Dan, gets married and I get another sister-in-law…and it’s you.
2002…I get my first niece. Her mom is you.
2005…my baby is going through chemo and his counts are bottomed out. We’re at the hospital while we wait for them to come back up. Someone shows up with a care basket and a mix CD of uplifting songs…of course, it’s you.
January 2018…I’m going through a tough time, and I get a message…”You know…you were my friend way before I was your sister-in-law. And I’m so glad I’m your family now. But I will always be your friend first. I want you to know something…I will always be here for you. And I love you. You are strong. And smart. And I love you to the moon.” The message was from you.
February 27, 2018…Mom calls and tells me I need to get to your house immediately. Something has happened…to you.
It’s been two years today since that phone call. And life hasn’t been the same without you. I never really knew life without you…without your friendship, without your protection, without your support.
There’s a hole…and that hole is you. I’ll always ache over losing you, but I am so very grateful to have had a friend, a sister that mattered so much and left a hole so deep. I hope everyone is that lucky.
